After I got my critique comments back for “Blood for Blood,” I had a lot to think about when it was time to write the second short story for my Fiction I class. As before, we had minimal guidelines: double-spaced, size 12 Times New Roman. But now the story could only be 500 words long.

How much of a story can you really tell in 500 words? Could you make a decent action story that short?

I struggled for ideas at first. Posting the feedback “Blood for Blood’ received on my blog helped me process a lot of mixed feelings. On the one hand, my classmates were happy I brought something different to class. They wanted more. I wanted to write more like that and keep getting better.

But Professor Williams wasn’t as encouraging. Like some other classmates, he questioned how “believable” the character Gwenhywfar was—a woman in a position of authority and leadership. I can recognize his blatant sexism for what it is now, but I didn’t think about it like that back then. All I could think about were the kinds of things I’d heard growing up:

• “Why do you always choose girl video game characters? They’re weaker and slower than all the male characters.”
• “There are too many female characters in your writing. You need more guys.”
• “Girls just can’t do the same things guys do, so they’re boring to read about.”
• “Only girls want to read books with girl main characters. If you want to appeal to a broader audience, you need a male main character.”

I mentioned in my previous reflection that spite is a great motivator for me. So when I was coming up with ideas for a 500-word action story, I decided to write about a female character who was both clever and physically strong.

Like with “Blood for Blood,” I decided to focus on a character for the novel I wanted to attempt for National Novel Writing Month later that year. If I remember correctly, I wanted the novel to start with this character on the run from the law. I wrote “Jailbird” as a sort of prologue for that story.

Themes in the Story

At the time I wrote “Jailbird,” I wasn’t thinking about whether the story had emotional depth or explored any bigger themes. I wanted to challenge myself to fit an action story into about 500 words. Set the scene, establish the stakes, get to the action, mission accomplished. It’s all action and atmosphere.

If I were to approach a similar plot with this word limit today, I would definitely give more attention to establishing the character and how they process things when the only thing on their mind is survival.

Inspiration From Other Works

One of my favorite video games of all time is The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. Something I always loved about it is the opening sequence. Your character finally wakes up in the back of a wagon, bound with several other prisoners on the way to the headsman’s block. Among your fellow prisoners are the leader of a rebellion who killed the high king, some of his soldiers, and a horse thief. When you’re called forward to get in line for execution, you learn your name isn’t on the list. But you’re sentenced to die anyway.

While you get to choose your character’s race, name, and appearance, and make world-altering decisions throughout the game, at no point is there an explanation for why you were arrested in the first place. You’re welcome to make up your own backstory for your own enjoyment. Maybe your character was caught red-handed, maybe they’re innocent.

But I always liked that it was left open. I wanted to bring that into my story and purposefully left out the details of why they were in jail.

Since I didn’t have much experience writing fight scenes, I watched the combat in the 2009 Sherlock Holmes for ideas. The narration helped explain what weaknesses were taken advantage of and what the purpose behind each attack and countermove.

How I Feel Rereading the Story Now

Gosh, I wish I’d done better than straight-up copying the bit about one person clapping their hands over their opponent’s ears to disorient them from the movie. But I still giggle thinking about how nervous I was to read the words “grabbing him by the balls” in front of my class. I didn’t know if I was allowed to use such salty language in the classroom.

“Jailbird” will always have a special place in my heart. While I never wrote the idea I planned for NaNoWriMo 2017, this story did evolve into something much bigger.

One of the comments from critique said, “We don’t know her well enough to support her escape, and for all we know she’s not exactly a Robin Hood.” That inspired me to add to the story a little, trying to figure out what it needed for a reader to support this thief’s story and her escape. I added more and more, and then I had the first draft of my current manuscript, “The Thieves of Traska.”

While I might not be proud of everything in the Legacy Collection, I’m definitely proud of this one. Even though I now agree with my classmates—that “Jailbird” doesn’t work well as a standalone because it needs more of an emotional arc and a less open-ended conclusion—I’m so excited to share this one with you.

See you back here Wednesday for the full story.

Set the Mood

If you like creative add-ons to fully immerse yourself in a story, I have some suggestions. While I didn’t necessarily have these on hand when I wrote the story, they’ve definitely enhanced my experience rereading them.

Soundtrack

“Jailbird” is such a short story, it takes less than five minutes to read it. Not really long enough to suggest a whole playlist for reading. But in this case, I can suggest the actual song I listened to on repeat while I wrote it: Tusk by Fleetwood Mac.

Scenttrack

One vivid scent description comes up in “Jailbird,” but I’m happy to say I don’t have a candle that smells like “the stench of old piss” and dirt. As a more pleasant alternative, I recommend Wandering Woods (formerly The Old Forest) by Frostbeard Studio.

The official scent description includes notes of rosewood, fig, dirt and spices. It’s very light for an earthy scent, making it suit the mood of the freedom and fresh air of the outdoors rather than the heavy closeness of being lost in the woods. I think of it like the smell kicked up by someone running to the trees for cover.

If that sounds like the kind of candle you want to add to your collection or gift to a friend, add Wandering Woods to your cart and see all the other bookish candles Frostbeard Studio makes that are inspired by your favorite reads. If you shop using my referral link below, you’ll get a 20% discount on your purchase.

Affiliate note: I’m a Frostbeard Studios affiliate because I love their candles. My referral link grants you a 20% off coupon, and if you make a purchase, I get a $10 off coupon. I only share products I personally use and love. Thanks for supporting my writing and my fantasy candle addiction!

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